Twenty-five years ago, I received my high school diploma from East Clinton. I was one of 10 valedictorians in my graduating class. I’m sure we all had deeply profound things to say, things that no one remembers all these years later. (I do remember Matt Carey’s speech because he used a yo-yo and did tricks and talked about walking the dog and rocking the baby and going around the world, but his is the only one.)

As another round of students is graduating this year, I pause to wonder: what would Jesus say? What would Jesus have to say to this year’s graduating class? I pieced together some of the “red letters” in the Bible and this is what I came up with:

Class of 2023: YOU MADE IT!

Y’all are salt of the earth. You light up my world. You don’t have to live on cafeteria food any longer. No more tests. Let’s go fishing and celebrate!

But first, it’s graduation day. You can’t get into trouble anymore. So, fess up to all the sins you think you’ve gotten away with this year and let me forgive you. Forgive each other. Forgiveness is more than saying sorry.

Here’s a bunch of advice from an older (yes, I know, you think 33 is ancient), wise guy: none of you are ready to get married. Quit fighting with your brothers and sisters. You’ll miss them when you go to college. Memorize someone’s phone number in case you go to jail. Make sure it’s not your parents. Make sure whoever it is they can make bail.

This next one is going to be tough, so listen carefully: pinky swearing won’t hold up in court.

Good things will happen to people who do bad things. Bad things will happen to people who do good things. That’s just the way it works sometimes. Love the people in your hood.

Prayers don’t have to be long. Anne Lamott figured it out: help, thanks, and wow are enough.

Clean your room before the vermin do. At some point you will need glasses. Your mom will not be sad to no longer hear you say, “What’s for dinner?” or “I have nothing to wear!” Okay, maybe she’ll be a little sad.

If your brother gets an eyelash in his eye, tell him to blink a bunch of times real fast. Don’t try to get it out on your own. Don’t try to pawn your mom’s pearls. They won’t give you nearly what they are worth.

Always ask. Always look for it first before you ask. Don’t ever open a door without knocking. The narrow road is the road less traveled, and it really will make all the difference.

Homeownership is a great responsibility. Sandcastles don’t count. Get your own pillow. If you get sick, go to the doctor. Learn to sew. Never try to pour wine back into the bottle. This is a terrible party trick.

Don’t say Beetlejuice three times. Eat your fruits and vegetables. Nap. The time is always right to do good. Family is more than blood. The two greatest jobs in the world are farming and fishing. Listen to understand. Small seeds become big trees.

There are two types of people in this world. The kind who sort their laundry and the kind who don’t. When it looks like you don’t have enough, just say “loaves and fishes” and it’ll all work out. Don’t ask for directions from someone who doesn’t know where they are going.

Wash your hands. Practice what you preach. Don’t swear. Don’t swallow camels. Everyone deserves a cup of cold water. Welcome strangers. Visit prisoners. Give away what’s been hanging in your closet unworn for years.

Eminem got it wrong. There’s more than one shot to lose yourself. Take up your cross, daily. Robert Fulghum got it right. All you really need to know you learned in kindergarten.

You will move mountains.

It does get better.

Don’t be afraid. Don’t be afraid. Don’t be afraid.

Two more things. The most important things. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul and all your mind. And love your neighbor as yourself.

That’s it, class of 2023. All the wisdom I have to impart. Okay, one final word: GO. Go wherever God takes you. Go all over the world. Make friends with people of all nationalities. I am your passport. I will be with you, always. GO.

Katie Terrell is the director of Wilmington Hope House and shares in the ministry at Dover Friends Meeting.